Friday, May 26, 2017

Post Mayoral Jobs for Mayor Hayward

I know the discussion has been on if Mayor Hayward will run for a third term or not.  As he is making the decision, I wanted to offer him some possible careers after Mayor based on some of his accomplishments as Mayor.

  • Director of Governmental Business Development at Beggs & Lane - working with politicians to show them how to generate needless litigation for B&L to handle.
  • Director of Business Development at Roads, Inc. - working with cities to see the genius behind paving every street in the City spending all of the potential street money for over a decade into the future because once it is done no road work will be needed for a decade...right?
  • Chico's model - Hey, he's in the last catalog half a dozen times anyway. Make it official!
  • Executive Director, Pensacola DIB - Hey, he's single handedly responsible for reshaping downtown and has been Peacock's whipping boy for years anyway.  
  • Public Image Officer, City of Pensacola - Just keep sending him to make speeches, appear at photo ops, cut ribbons, and schmooze for a whole lot less.
  • Fire Chief - Allen is retiring.  Hayward knows as much about fighting fires as Allen does. 
  • Partner, Redfish Harbour - He had this job for 5 years prior to office, development still has NOT ONE HOUSE.  After eight years, that job is still available.  After all he is a real estate developer.
  • Chief Model - Laura Bogan Photography - He has perfected this roll over eight years.  The commercial applications should be HUGE!
  • Executive Director, Community Maritime Park - He is solely responsible for the completion and marketing of the Maritime park and the rapid commercial development of the park.  After eight years of his successes, we would not want to lose him here.
  • Chief Greeter Pensacola Intergalactic Airport - Instead of a video of him as visitors arrive, why not just have him personally greet folks as they get here.  He could have a photo booth. Bogan can still take the pictures.
  • Senior Vice President of Developmental Opportunities and Cross Collaborative Endeavors for Projects and Commercially Applicable Professional, Academic and Philanthropic Analysis - Levin Enterprises.  Heck, Fred was paying him for nothing before office, may as well go back to what he was doing.
See Mr. Mayor, plenty of opportunities on the outside.  Move along little doggie!


Anonymous said...

Chicos Model? No, he should try something more up his alley... like the porn industry.

Anonymous said...